RATING: 40/100. TERRIBLE.
Eminem is way too old to be making albums like this still. He is trying SO HARD to be problematic that it just bounces off of him and becomes repetitive. His old music had a charm with the violent and oftentimes controversial lyrics - this album does that just to do it. There is no charm to it - there are some good songs and I can appreciate the flows and beats here, but the lyrics just dumb the album down so badly.
I LOVE Eminem - but I can see when he's being corny. This album just shows his age so much - this is basically "You want to cancel me?? Hahaha" "I'm problematic!! Hahaha!" like yes... we know. This was a good thing about your music until you started trying too hard - this whole album is just him trying WAY TOO HARD and missing the mark SO BADLY.
This is probably one of the most lyrically incompetent albums I have ever heard. Why is he bringing up Caitlyn Jenner (using her deadname and saying she is not a woman)? Like okay... what exactly are we doing here? I guess I get what he's doing - he's no stranger to
commentary and comments like this but it just feels so... irrelevant?
I started listening to this album when it came out and I didn't even finish it. I was SO excited for him to "go back to his old style". He tried, but he did NOT hit the mark he needed to hit. This is easily one of the worst albums I have heard this year and I'm typing this only two songs into the... 19 track runtime.
You know it's bad when the lyrics are so bad you LAUGH. I was literally laughing during 'Trouble'. What is he even doing at this point - I'm dumbfounded. How did he go from one of the greatest rappers of all time (he still has that status to me, but yikes) to this. The downfall is immeasurable. Also as bad as 'Trouble' is 'Breaking News' and almost, unfortunately 'Guilty Conscience 2' - the song I was most excited for sounds nothing and I mean NOTHING like the original.
"You gonna cancel me, yeah? Gen-Z me, bruh?" (really??)
On a positive note I really like 'Brand New Dance'. It really sounds like something from his album 'Encore' which is something I really enjoyed. It isn't the best Eminem song by any means but it has that catchiness and comedic charm that was present all throughout 'Encore'. It's a guilty pleasure type of song and it reminds me so much of 'Encore' with both the lyrics and the beat/style of the song. I love how catchy it is. It even includes a spoken segment exactly like one from 'Encore'.
I really like some of the nods to his Slim Shady alter-ego and his older albums, but it isn't enough to keep this album afloat unfortunately. This is all an issue caused by the lyrics that are borderline abysmal at points. I like the concept of the album but the execution of said concept was not done as well as it could've been done. Eminem just doesn't have the ability that he used to.
Looking into some of the lyrics made me realize there are some good lyrical moments on here - but it's nothing compared to the amount of corniness on this album. The production is great (on some songs) but... the lyrics just overshadow everything - and not in a good way. This album severely lacks the charm and humor of his previous albums - it tries but it's a huge swing and a miss. The ad-libs on this album are also god awful. It was crazy to hear Bizarre on this album but even his feature paying homage to D-12 and more of Eminem's work just didn't hit like it should've.
One thing I can remark on is how much I love the tone of 'Temporary'. That song almost had me crying with how sweet it was - I love how much he genuinely loves his daughter and how he shows it with so much pride. I love how he makes songs dedicated to her.
Here's some of the... lyrical genius of this album...
""You can't say ret**ded," shut up, midget (The f***?)
And we've been tryna break the habit of sayin' any R-words (Yeah)
But I'm still an addict, so it's getting harder (Ah)"
"But when it comes to givin' it to anybody, boy, is Bruce generous (Marshall)
And I'm 'bout as much of a boy as Bruce Jenner is (Damn)
'Cause I'm not a boy, I'm a man, bi**h, man-bi**h (Haha)
My speech is free as his choice to choose gender is (Man)"
"Mom shaming, dad shaming (Ah), yeah
Fat-shaming (What?), man-splaining, blah (Pfft)
Crybabies attack Shady, wah
Mad 'cause they can't tame me (Get it)
Here come the censors (Look out), like the Avengers
And they assemble like Prince and then turn
A word like "ginger" into the N-word
All these pronouns (Ah) I can't remember (Damn)
They or them, theirs? (Whose?) His or him, hers? (Ah)
Into them girls who bought tits to get attention
Then get hit on by ugly men who are (Creep)
Not in your league, so you pretend you're a victim"
"I got an infrared like the ginger stepkid who pissed the bed (Ginger)"
"Like using the F-word for gay is wrong and offensive (What?)
And insensitive as if me sayin' the R-word isn't (Wait)
Wait a minute, which R-word? Ra*e or re**rded, midget? (Not cool, guys)
Would this rhyme be okay if South Park had did it? (Okay, screw you guys)
Would it make you less angry if Cartman spit it? (Goddammit)"
"And as far as what I just stated, regarding midgets
You'll probably think I'll just say that I'm playin', I'm not, I meant it (Yeah)
Swear to God I see one of them little fu***rs come at me"
*The ENTIRTY of 'Trouble'. Literally. What on earth was he thinking when he wrote that stupid 41 second song. He wants to be edgy so bad and he sounds like a middle schooler trying to be cool.
"And watch me shoot 'em up (Pew-pew)"
"I behave like a child, ayy"
"Holy shit, Cait' Jenner just flipped (Yo)
Told me knock this shit off and quit, and get off her d**k (Damn)" (AGAIN???)
"that's gay (What's wrong with that?)
And not the good kind of gay either (What?)"
"Before I get banned, kicked off Twitter
And TikTok 'cause they so damn ticked off, bitter
They want me to bounce (Like what?) like a fabric softener"
"I bought Heaven when it was up for sale and now I need a refund, bae"
"Now my followers are like a Satanic cult (What?)
Yeah, they listen to me like when Manson spoke (Shh)
They say I don't know struggle no more, that's a joke (Haha)
Bi**h, the fu**in' elevator in my mansion's broke (See?)
I have to walk like half a block to get a can of Coke (Damn)"
"Gen Z, here they come now (Now)
'Bout to unload rounds (Brrt)
Pronouns (Shit)
Got me like, "Woah now" (Woah)
Homie, let's slow down (Chill)
No need to get so wound (Man)
Ready to throw down (Yo)
If I mispronounce (Thee, them)
Whoops (Sorry), oh wow
Got heterosexuals crammin' 'em down our throats now (He, she, they, them)
Like I'm gettin' snow-plowed"
"Try not to get seen
With Ben Affleck, me, and Seth Green hangin' on to the left wing
Of Jeffrey Epstein's jet screamin', "Hey, don't forget me" (Haha)
Shady as Bill, takin' the pill and putting it in your soft drink (Ah)"
"Knock, knock (Who's there?), boo (Boo who?)
Hey, why you cryin', shorty? Ew, 'cause I boo'd you (Woah)"
"Look who's talkin', dog, like Brian from Family Guy (Huh)" (this one is just so funny)
"I beat the beat silly, on the grind like teeth gritting
Call me "obesity" (Why?)"
"Yeah, I walk around more confused than my aunt Linda's man-friend
A black transgender Klan member (What?)
Who's a Caitlyn Jenner fan and a (What?)
Member of Grindr and Tinder"
"Diabetes and instead of us dieting, we can just have a pie-eating contest (Delicious)"
"Yeah, all my obese people, if you're fat, proud, and you know it (Hey)
Raise your hand if you're shovin' food in your mouth at this moment (Mmm)
But if you're mad 'cause they're clownin' you for poundin' them donuts (What?)
Put 'em down and either do somethin' about it or own it"
"Turned me into smiley face emoji"
"Bumpin' R. Kelly's favorite group, the black guy pee's" (funny)
"My transgender cat's Siamese
Identifies as black, but acts Chinese" (HUUHH??)
"You too, Paul, got two balls, big as RuPaul's"
"And now transgenders attack us, frontwards and backwards
They laughin', throw midgets at us (Ha)" (HHUUUUHHHH??!?!?)
"Here's the thing 'bout re**rded people (What?)
They don't fu**ing know they're re**rded"
"You're still mentally
Thirteen and still thirsty for some controversy" (literally you! That is the best description of this album!)
"Little people are trolling me (Ha)
They saying they've had it (What?) up to here with me"
"Got you shook like Shakira's ass (Yeah)" (funny but also uuuhh what.)
"Man, you're so full of shit, you need MiraLAX" (funny)
"Open your mouth and shit flies out, just lies
You thinkin' you can rip my ass, undo these zipties"
"Rear naked choke hold, let me go, yo
Here, take it, bozo (Yeah)
Weird bait, you homo (You ready?)"
"I got that new drip that drowned titanical cruise ships"
"Now "cancelled" ain't the word for me
You need a term that's probably stronger than dirty laundry (Hell)
This controversy got me in the worst of quandaries"
"Won't be talkin' about Purell when Santa ties your hands" (this one made me laugh I had to include it)
"Industrial-strength high-end brand
Frying pan"
"Yeah, this whole sub-genre with all these corny white rappers, I'm not a fan of it
It ain't my fault, but like sock puppets, I had a hand in it" (you literally are a corny white rapper now dude settle down)
"Brain is dead, space cadet
Like when Ye forgets to take his meds"
"So when they get mad or angry at
A statement that I may have said
I just say, "Man, I didn't say that shit, Shady did""
"Tobey Maguire got bit by a spider, but see, me, it was a goat"
"My city Leia and I'm Obi-Wan, got a mission to pass, I just might be the hope"
"[Interlude: Big Sean]
Boy
Ayy, ayy" (bro...)
"If he Obi-Wan, then I gotta be Yoda"
"Tobey Maguire got bit by a spider, me? Must've got bit by a goat (Yeah)
I used to dream as a kid I would grow (Baa) to be one, I hope that I inspire hope (For what?)"
"I get on a beat and it's like that "Eye of the Tiger" song is playin' on my head on repeat"
"I can't help but feel like a victim of child abuse
'Cause I am 'bout to get that goddamn belt (That strap, man)"
*The ENTIRE 'Guess Who's Back' interlude. (I do like that he brought back Ken Kaniff but STILL. Also this interlude is really funny when you actually listen to - I didn't know what it was when I added this to the list, but like... still.)
So yeah... this is without a doubt one of the worst albums of the year and probably of the decade already. The falloff of Eminem is absolutely insane. 'Temporary' and 'Somebody Save Me' were beautiful lyrically but the rest of the songs were not.
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